Running Down A Dream

About a year ago I noticed that my body was getting extra doughy thanks to my sedentary life as a freelancer.  It's easy to skip a meal and then eat an extra portion at dinner or sit chained to my laptop all day when a deadline is looming.  Back when I was commuting into work, those little walks to the bus stop, to the subway, and around at lunch added up towards my daily step count.  Now that I'm at home working most of the time my step count to and from the bathroom isn't as mighty as it once was.

This bothered me and I knew it was time for a change. I want to be a role model to my kids, and being healthy is a part of this. I have all of this flexibility as a freelancer which is great for kid pick-up, appointments, and the numerous other errands I can fit into my day, but I wasn't spending any of it on myself.  Then I remembered how much I missed running, something I used to do all the time before I was put on bed rest when I was pregnant with Molly and Jack - which was years ago. I wrote about getting started running again earlier this year, along with my very slow building love for running here.

Image courtesy of Pinterest

Fast forward 11 months and one 5KM run completed on my birthday later and I figured it was time to begin challenging myself further with my running. I run several times a week on a very regular basis, and see progress.  I track my distances, but with no real end goal beyond debating an 8KM or 10KM in spring of 2018. While many of the changes in my body aren't noticeable to the eye, I see and feel changes every day.  I see changes in the way I'm able to run after the kids, the muscles in my calves and legs, and the energy I have to really tackle a work assignment after taking a runch (running lunch break).  As necessary in the world of freelance, I am a very deadline driven person, so I decided to apply this to my running to help make it even more of a priority in my life.  I decided that I was going to run 50 miles over the month of November, and today, a day before my deadline, (under-promise, over-deliver - is a work motto of mine) I logged 50.44 miles over a series of 17 runs.

Some runs this month were triumphant where I clocked some of my best mile times ever.  Others were painful and slow and I didn't want to get started, but I completed them and I'm happy that I did.

Image courtesy of Etsy

One of the things I love about running is the progress I can see and how my body becomes capable of things that it couldn't even dream about doing just a few weeks earlier.

Now that I'm riding high on my last challenge completed, I wanted to raise the stakes, particularly since my one year runiversary is coming up (that's a real word right?).  In the month of December I am going to run 60 miles.  I mean I have an extra day to get it done, after all and there isn't any additional temptation to drink eggnog instead, right?

So now I've done it, I've said it and no matter what happens I'm accountable virtually and to myself.

What inspires you?

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Drive - 7 Essential Tips When Shopping For A Used Car

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Image Courtesy of Pexels

When my husband and I first discovered we were expecting, we were convinced that we wouldn't need a car.  We live in a major city, in a very walkable area, and have numerous options nearby for public transit.   After all, it would be good for both of us to get out with our baby strapped to our chest and we could use a car sharing service on those few occasions when we needed to drive.

Mid-winter we went for our first ultrasound and discovered we were having twins.  This news changed so many things for us in terms of what our life would look like, including our transportation needs, independence, and finances.  Thankfully, that spring my parents made us an offer on their old car that we couldn't turn down.

I don't know how we did it, but for a couple of years, we managed to cram our lives with infant twins, including all of the baby supplies and a giant double stroller into the confines of a small old Pontiac Sunfire.  Then, during a routine oil change I asked our mechanic whether or not he thought our car would pass the emissions test required to get our license plate renewed that year.  We discovered that our car would require far more money in repairs than it was worth to keep it on the road.

It was time to start saving, and start shopping for the next family car we'd own.  As a perpetual planner, I began to write lists of must haves and nice to haves, we worked out a budget that would help us find the right car for us, and our needs.  These are some of the things that helped us make the right decision for our family:

Image Courtesy of Pexels

The Used Car Shopping Checklist

1. Make a list of all the things you use your car for
   It was important for us to think about what we would need the car to do over next few years of our lives, including things like road trip vacations.  We wanted something with low enough mileage to let us take a number of lengthy road trips for the life of our 'new to us' used car.  We wanted something that would work for everyday use like grocery shopping, as well as camping, and hauling my husband's band gear to weekly practice and gigs.  Take into account how often you car pool, and how that fits into your plan.  If you only need a bigger car once or twice a year, it may be worth renting for those rare times instead of purchasing a bigger car.
2. Think about what you like in a car
   Our little Sunfire was quick off the mark which was important to my husband, which we later learned in car terms meant it had "low end torque".  I wanted something that had more size than our last car, with minimal blind spots to ensure safety.  Since inclement weather is a part of most winters where we live, good tires were important and the fact that our car came with snow tires was an added bonus.  We also wanted a car that was good on gas mileage, so we wouldn't be adding in additional transportation costs at the gas pump each week.
3. The Goldilocks problem
   There are many in my generation that shudder at the thought of becoming "minivan people" and both of us weren't ready to go full on van yet, but we knew we wanted a lot more space. We checked out a number of station wagons, but most of the ones that we liked were beyond our personal budget. It turned out that a CUV (crossover utility vehicle) which is literally the bridge between a mid-sized car and a larger SUV was perfect for us. We ended up going for a KIA Rondo that has a pop up row of seats at the back that can easily be used when we're transporting extra kids or adults.
   
   
   

   

   Image Courtesy of Pexels

4. It pays to do your research & homework
   Take your list and see what types of cars will meet your needs.  There are so many excellent  resources available, such as Cars.com, to help you research, find, and sell cars in your area from the comfort of your home (new or used). Drive the car to understand how it feels and then take it (and park it) places where you'll be using the car in your 'real life'.  If you aren't comfortable parking a car in that tight spot you end up in several times a week, it's not the right car for you.  Same goes for baby accessories....we found that a number of cars that were considerably larger on the outside weren't able to house our double stroller much better than our much smaller car.
5. Remember nice to haves are just that - nice to have
   The car we bought happened to have a DVD player in it that we were super excited about at the time, but here's the thing - we never use it, even on really long road trips.  Anything that's added on to a car, will inflate the price (sometimes, significantly) and should be considered carefully.  It may be cheaper for you to install the GPS or DVD player yourself after the purchase rather than pay for it with the car.  If the model you are going to buy happens to have these features consider it a bonus, not a 'must have' if it really isn't.
6. Explore your financing options
   We were lucky enough to have a four month lead time between discovering our car was about to be pulled off the road and needing to purchase a new one.  In that time I picked up some side hustles to help us afford the car we wanted/needed without accumulating debt for our purchase. Looking for a loan? Contact your local bank, mortgage provider, and the car sales team to see what options will work best for you before you find a car you fall in love with.  Don't forget to ask about trade-ins, or research selling your previously loved car online.  Selling our old Sunfire knocked a few hundred dollars off of our purchase price, and every little bit makes a difference.
7. Have a trusted mechanic take a look
   Having a mechanic that you can trust is up there with having a good dentist and doctor in my books.  By having our mechanic take a look at our car before we purchased, we were able to get an idea of the general repairs and expenses that would be coming down the pipeline over the next couple of years, which thankfully for us only involved replacing a battery.  He also gave us an unbiased opinion on whether or not this car was right for us.

What helped you find the perfect used car?

Push - Report Cards & Parent Teacher Meetings

Last week was report card and parent teacher meeting week.  There weren't too many surprises to us sandwiched in the reports and the meetings, but something did strike me this week.  In talking to other parents around the school yard there is one thing that all of us seem to have in common: the way we try to push our children to be better.

Maybe it's a part of the parental instinct, but it doesn't seem to matter if someone's child is at the top of their class, or just struggling to make it through - everyone I spoke to mentioned nudging their child in a particular direction, academic success.

For the most part this is great.  Who doesn't need a whole cheering section that is hoping for the best for them?  Other times I think about how exhausting it is, for both us and the minions.  Some nights I don't want to practice counting, adding, subtracting, sounding out words, or working on building fine motor skill, and they're only in grade one.  Sometimes  I just want to cuddle my kids and watch cartoons. I want to have tickle fights.  I want to bake cookies together.  I want to make fart noises just so I can hear them giggle.  I can only imagine how 'over' the practicing they are some days.

Molly and dad at Pioneer Village together last weekend

Listening to all of the glowing things the teachers had to say about what sweet, kind, happy and compassionate children I have, it made me take a breath to think about how much more important this is compared to academics.

We spend so much time trying to catch up, trying to push for the next milestone that there's always something that we're reaching for - and it's frustrating. No matter what we do, it seems they don't reach that next goal until they're ready...and when we push too hard it isn't fun for absolutely anyone.  Sure the extra time together practicing helps, but sometimes we need to take our foot off the gas pedal.

I think about the age of my children, born twins in the last third of the year, being held to the exact same academic standards as someone who was born in January, so essentially someone who has 10 percent more "life" experience and "wisdom" as my kids, and how much difference eight months makes in what they can and cannot do at six years old.  This makes me realize that it's time to calm the eff down. They'll get there, eventually, and if not we'll be there beside helping them, hopefully  holding their hands more often than we are pushing them from behind.

Hey parents and adults everywhere: Try to remember to enjoy the journey just as much as the destination....I know I need the reminder more frequently than I'd like to admit.

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Paperback Writer: Sharing My Writing On Other Sites

It's that time of the month again when I share some of the writing I've been completing for other publications.  This is where I learn all of that delightful trivia that I can wow people with at cocktail parties.  Molly and Jack were particularly interested in finding out the harsh realities behind Disney Princesses.

Nowadays as my full-time job I write and ghostwrite articles for online publications, organizations and blogs, in addition to providing public relations services.  While I can't really share my ghostwritten articles on this platform, cause then I wouldn't really be a ghostwriter would I, I can share some of the other stuff I have been working on.

Click on the links for the topics that interest you most, and if you enjoy what I wrote please share, like, and follow, and keep parenting and reading on!  If you have any ideas for a story, a playground review, or article on any front, feel free to shout it out!  I'm always looking for new sources of inspiration!

Disney Princesses

Dirty Secrets Behind Your Favourite Disney Princesses

How Much Can You Really Make On Reality TV?

8 Reality Shows That Have The Lowest Pay Rate (& 8 You Can Bank On)

Celebrity Parenting Gossip

15 Pregnant Celebs Who Were Brutally Called Out On Social Media

15 Celeb Dads With The Most Baby Mamas

Pregnancy

16 Things That Happen During Pregnancy Doctors Keep On The DL

13 Things Moms Never Expect To Bring Home With The Newborn

Relationships

15 Nasty Habits She’ll Reveal Once You Say I DO

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Hold On

For all the boasting about self-care and couple time, I can be pretty garbage at making it a reality - we all can.  Sure I book date nights, manage to get out a few times a month with friends, book necessary appointments, and get in some runs, but as a parent a lot of the time the kids come first.  Mostly because that's what we need to do and what we get used to.  It's easy to forget that the original family line-up was just Chris and I.

Then, every once in a while, I get reminded about our couple team and how we both step up to the plate for each other when pitched a curve ball.

Chris has been experiencing back pain (which manifests itself in pain walking or standing in the lower back and legs) for nearly two months now, and it shows no sign of letting up - it's actually getting worse.  He's been to the doctor, he's been to the physio for hundreds of dollars of care, and after over a month of special exercises, X-rays, and a diagnosis of what we thought was spinal stenosis, we're back to the drawing board.  His X-rays have come back normal, the physio tapped out and now we've been referred to a specialist sports physician.  Good news right? Not exactly.

Image Courtesy of Giphy

Yesterday a call came in from the doctor's office confirming an appointment, six weeks from now.  I don't know if it's lucky or unlucky for Chris that I was the one who got the call.  While in terms of the world of specialists another six weeks for an appointment after eight weeks of pain seems like a lifetime. I understand how lucky we are to be in Canada where this treatment will now be covered under OHIP, but it still sucks to play the waiting game.

This mystery problem has been unrelenting.  He's been in constant pain.  It's impacted his mood, his patience and all of our lives, and his ability to do everyday things with us ranging from going for a simple walk to playing with the kids.

So I protested, I begged, I pleaded, and I got us on a cancellation list so as soon as there is someone who bails on their appointment, Chris can run/hobble there in a heartbeat and we can figure out what the heck is going on and do what we can to improve his pain and try and get things back to normal.

I later found out that Chris has been telling everyone how I wouldn't take no for an answer.  At first I thought he was annoyed about me and my big mouth.  Then he explained how I said things he wouldn't have if he had received the call about the appointment, how I, hopefully, was going to get results. I guess in the mess of parenting, I don't go mama bear all that often for my husband, and it's easy to forget to take care of your partner or yourself.

Sometimes it's nice to be taken care of, even when you're an adult.  So parents, do something nice for your spouse without them asking - even if that something involves you saying "that's unacceptable" over and over again to a doctor's office receptionist.  It means more than you think.

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My Kids In 140 Characters (Or Less)

We spend a lot of time with the minions and I'm fortunate enough to record the things that they say and do so I can look back on it and laugh.  Some of it makes the blog and other smaller moments don't.  One of the brilliant things about Twitter is how it's the ultimate parenting "elevator speech", because you have to keep it short. Below are Tweets, conversations, parental musings and things that the minions have done or said over the past month, for your reading pleasure that haven't made it to the blog.

Image Courtesy of Tenor

1. M: A is for Apple. J: A is for ass, like they said in #SchoolOfRock so you can't get mad mommy #facepalm #parenting

2. Brother: Did u tell ur friend ur half demon? M: That's just pretend Bro: Exactly what a demon would say u foul demon #parenting

3. M: You need to stop singing that song Mommy! Me: Why? M: You sound like a Disney prince & I just can't handle it. #Parenting

4. Arguing with your child about how peeing your pants while in the bathroom is not "making it in time" #facepalm #parenting

Image Courtesy of  www.ifc.com

5. What happens when they finally end up in the same swimming class? insistence on holding hands each time they jump in the pool #TwinLife


6. J: Is #pluto sad that it used to be a planet and then they changed their minds? I know I'd feel sad if I was Pluto #science #parenting


7. Me: brush ur teeth J: I curse u. U will have bad luck, be poked constantly & catch on fire. Me: Slight over-reaction? J: shrugs #parenting



8. Dear #autocorrect I have 2 kids in grade 1. I regretfully assure u I am typing lice (not love or live) but appreciate ur optimism

9. J: U know how I know I'm part #puppy? Me: How? J: Cause I like to lick ice cream off the floor #facepalm #parenting #ToddlerLife

To read more blogs featuring the wacky things my kids say as featured on twitter, follow me @Sarabethbug & click here, click here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, &here.