40 Things I've Learned at 40

A few days ago I turned 40 years old.  Many people have asked me how I feel about this milestone, and so far I'm really happy about it. I managed to celebrate with family and friends and had a wonderful dinner with the kids.  With milestone birthdays people often ask if it's bothering me.  The short answer - no.  That being said, a new decade has made me reflective on lessons learned, particularly those since I turned 30!


Here are 40 Lessons Learned at 40

Me - the night of my 40th Celebration

1. Read the extra bed time story.
2. Find a dentist you love and go regularly.  Dental work is expensive, protect your teeth.  This is something I wish I'd done more of in my 20's.
3. Find something active to do that you love to help reduce your stress levels.
4. Be wary of the sale rack, and make sure you love something before you buy it.
5. Let go of friendships that have passed their expiration date.
6. Remember you don't always have to bake the cake for the school sale.  Be the mom who buys the cutlery and saves time.
7. Sleep with your cellphone in another room.  It's not worth the distraction.
8. If you can outsource the chores you hate most.
9. Every time you buy something new, donate something you already own to help reduce clutter.
10. Enjoy the little things, like climbing into a bed with a freshly cleaned set of sheets. 
11. Book time in advance to see your close friends, otherwise it will only happen at kid related functions.
12. Run errands at lunch to free up your evenings.
13. Tell people you love that you love them.  Often.  It takes no time.
14. Text that friend who you know is having a bad day, week, or even month.
15. DVR favourite shows to skip ads and get to bed a little earlier.
    
    
    

    

    A Cake Made by Molly & Dad

    
    
16. Most of the things you worry about will never happen.  I'm still working on this one.
17. Back up important computer files, one day your system will crash.
18. Use a calendar, digital or paper to avoid double booking.
19. Buy comfortable shoes that look great.
20. Invest in a raincoat and warm winter coat to help you keep active in bad weather.
21. Listen to music while you cook, it makes it more fun.
22. Write down the strange and wonderful things your children say to show them when they're older.
23. Make to do lists.  It's good to cross things off, and to it keeps you for forgetting.
24. Make a grocery list, not more trips to the store.  
25. It takes the same amount of money to keep the gas tank half full as it does half empty (that's one from my grandfather)
26. If you're feeling cranky take a walk.
27. If that doesn't work take a nap.
28. Get rid of the clothes you don't fit into from high school.  Even if they fit, they're outdated.
29. Get into photos with your kids, no matter how you look.
30. Give trusted friends spare keys.  They'll come in handy.
    
    

    

    A Less Child Appropriate Cake as designed by my good friend E.

31. Don't be afraid to ask for help when you need it.
32. A good babysitter is worth their weight in gold.  Treat them like that.
33. Make your own traditions.  Even if they're small, like backwards dinner.
34. Find your power hours to get work done. Schedule meetings for times outside of these hours to get more work done.
35. Don't trust anyone who is rude to service staff.
36. Thank your parents.
37. Not everyone will like you, but some people will love you to pieces.  Focus on them.
38. Sometimes there is no going back and that's okay.
39. Don't begrudge how you got there, work on where you're going.
40. Take care of yourself first, put your oxygen mask on first, then help others.

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Call Me a Dog - Tips Intigrating Puppy into a Home with Kids

We took one of the big familial plunges and added to our family - not with a sibling for the minions, but a dog.  For the past six months I'd been thinking a lot about how much I enjoy my life freelance writing, but also how lonely it can get when I'm working on deadline without any face-to-face meetings.  Chris casually mentioned us getting a pet - a cat or a dog.

As someone who has only had cats in my adult life, but grew up with dogs as a child - I instantly knew I wanted a dog.  So we began researching our options - puppy vs. older dog, rescue vs. bred dog, as well as the type of dog that would be a good fit for us.  We knew we would need a dog who would be good with both kids and adults, as well as other dogs, big enough to survive a pair of rough and tumble kids and it's cousin dog (a large, rowdy and sweet chocolate lab).  After researching some rescues, and discovering a number of them wouldn't consider you if you had small children, we decided we'd raise a puppy.

We brought Ted (AKA Farmer Ted), a nine week old, nine pound Brittany puppy into our home a week ago, and while there have been some speed bumps and learning curves, for the most part it's been easier than I thought, although still a lot of work that requires a lot of patience.

Much like the kids, he's adorable when he's sleeping and not causing trouble!

14 Tips for Intigrating a Puppy into a Home with Kids - Week 1

1. Toddler Proof Your Home
We spent the better part of a weekend re-toddler proofing our home.  Art supplies were moved to higher shelves, baby gates were installed and shoes were all moved into cubbies by our front door.
2. Give both the Dog and Your Kids Their Space
By putting in the baby gates we know the dog is in areas we want him to be in, and the kids can spread out their Lego, Barbies, books, and whatever upstairs without fear of the dog choking on it, or destroying their things.
3. Get the Dog's Space Ready Before you Bring them Home
We had the crate ready to go, as well as the spot where we'd be feeding Ted to help establish a routine right away.  If you can, ask for a blanket that smells like mom or your puppies litter for him to sleep with to reduce separation anxiety.
4. Block out Morning Sun with a Blanket or Two
We didn't want to be up with the sun, so we put a few blankets over the back of the crate. Not only does this prevent the dog from waking up at dawn.  It also makes the crate feel like a cozy den.  Never punish your dog by putting them in a crate.  Leave it open at all times when they don't need to be in it so they can retreat their when they want and not just overnight or when you are out.

Play Time!

5. Accidents will happen
For the entire week we've had around one accident each day.  It's usually in the morning during the chaos while everyone is getting ready for work or school. We've been playing around with the dog's breakfast time as well as morning feeding to help minimize this, and it's slowly improving.  The worst is when you've just brought the dog in, he's refused to go and then immediately pees all over the freshly washed kitchen floor.
6. No water or Food at Least Three Hours Before Bed
The earliest I've been up with Ted is 6AM and I'm guessing this has to do with us implementing this rule.
7. Clean up Accidents Right Away
The longer something stays on the ground the more likely it is to become a pee spot.  Clean up any poop in the yard right away to prevent your dog (or kids) from stepping in it.
8. Teach the Kids to Be Alphas
Our dog is teething and gets nippy.  Apparently it is common until a puppy is four to six months old. This upset the kids a lot. We taught them to plant their feet like trees and firmly tell the dog 'no'.  While everyone is still learning, the kids are getting great at shutting down the dog.
9. Puppy Proof your Outdoor Space
Before Ted arrived home we found a hole in our fence that needed to repair.  Once we brought Ted home we also discovered a few areas where we'd need to pay particular attention, since he loves stealing cherry tomatoes out of our garden.
10. The Kids May Get Jealous
I have been asked several times (by both kids) if they are cuter than the dog.  I have always said yes.  Although the dog will be a lot of work, try to carve out some extra one on one time with the kids too. Even if it's just to cuddle and read a story.  The dog may also get jealous of the kids - we've noticed a spike in bad behaviour when we are ignoring the dog in favour of the kids.

Resting during a walk

11. Give them an Important Dog Related Job
Molly likes feeding Ted dinner.  Jack likes finding him toys when he gets nippy.  It's little things, but it keeps them involved and interested in care and training for Ted.
12. Walks may be Frustrating
Last week Ted walked on the leash for the first time.  He can't start puppy training until after he gets his booster shots.  We're supposed to walk him for ten minutes twice a day, and increase it by five minutes per walk each month he gets older.  Some walks are great, others not so much, but most of them are to a park where the kids can play both with the dog and independently so it feels more like a treat and less like a chore!
13. Keep your shoes and Coat by the Door (but out of reach for the dog)
The faster you can get outside with the dog when he needs to go, the better - particularly when potty training.
14. Get Your Own Supplies
Today reminded me I don't have great rain gear and I'm going to spending a lot of time outside.  Keep a list of these things and make it as easy and comfortable as possible to care for your pup in all weather.

More tips to come as we stumble though puppyhood and doggy training into life with our little dog.

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Hiking the Emily Tract - The Kawarthas

It's been a while.  Probably the longest break I've taken from blogging since I started nearly seven years ago. Summer got in the way.  Time with kids got in the way.  Deadlines got in the way, and a broken laptop got in the way.

Thankfully one of the other blogging 'barriers' was a week away in the Kawarthas with my family, the minions, and limited time spent online.

We were able to explore some fantastic hikes thanks to some cool breezes that prevented Jack from getting 'too sweaty' - something that he hates when hiking, and that often gets pushed to later in autumn when the nice weather is fleeting.

Over our week we tried out three hikes and by far the best one was the one at Emily Tract Trail (not to be confused with Emily Provincial Park, whose hikes were a huge disappointment (and waste of a $14 day pass fee.)  This hike of Emily Tract had free parking, well marked trails, and sweet small views of nature as opposed to big "Awwww moments" often found on hikes with big climbs or waterfall features.  If you ever find yourself in the area consider checking out these dual 2KM loops.  Word to the wise, avoid these trails when it's wet outside (early spring or right after a lot of rain) as it could get quite muddy, slippery, and buggy.

Our own miniature Smurf or Fairy Village 

Our Trail Leader...Miss Molly

The weather may be warm, but the fallen red leaves say that winter is coming

The sun peaking through our shady trail

Final leg of the trail

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