I consider myself a feminist, and since becoming a parent have set out to provide a solid example for both of my children on what it means to be a woman. I want them to know about what equality means, what friendship means, and that there is no right or wrong answer for what a family or romantic partnership is and can be.
Here's the problem: sometimes it's hard not to feel like a fraud. My husband and I have a fairly traditional relationship, and have lived an extremely privileged life. The exception I have felt is how motherhood, the perception of motherhood, and my position as a parenting or "mommy blogger" have impacted my career. Career wise things changed when I became a mom, there's no doubt about it, but at the end of the day am I just another family in a cookie cutter mold of societal norms, perpetuating the nuclear family? What am I doing to promote the cause, to help create a world for my children where they both will have ample and equal opportunities to be and do what they want when our family is the status quo? Here's the big thing, my family structure, my relationship, my partnership, what I've been doing with my career, it's all my choice, and one I'm incredibly thankful for.
Who said construction workers can't wear pretty dresses? Me at 4 years old. |
For the most part I feel like Chris and I are rocking the whole parenting open minded children who are both aware and accepting of the many different lifestyles around them. We want them to know that they should aim for their own happiness, not what they feel they should do or become because other people have told them to.
Then something gets said or asked of me by my children that makes my blood boil even though I know that my four and a half year olds are not trying to oppress their mother, they are simply trying to better understand the world around them.
For example when a child says:
"You're sitting in daddy's seat."
We both assure them that we share the drivers seat and that not one of us "owns it"
or
"Did you ask daddy for permission to X (INSERT RANDOM THING I AM DOING HERE)?" Then it is explained that mommy and daddy work together as a team, and don't always need permission for everything they do.
It's hard not project your own personal hang-ups on your kids, I'm still learning alongside them and happily. We are all so lucky that we live where we do, that we have the choices that we do.
What feminist inspired children's book you are you going to read with your kid on International Women's Day?
Here's what's on our reading list:
Rosie Revere Engineer by Andrea Beaty
Girl Power 5 Minute Stories by Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
The Paperbag Princess by Robert Munsch
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I love your writing. You are awesome!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! This means a lot to me.
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