Panda Song

The buzz surrounding Toronto's Zoo resident giant panda, Er Shun, birthing twins this morning had me thinking about my two little cubs and their own twin identities.  While both the minions are aware that they share a birthday and are twins, I don't feel that their "twinness" has been ingrained on them the same way it is for other multiples.  We have rarely had the time or inclination to put them in matching attire, and attempts at things like coordinating outfits or Halloween costumes have been epic failures.  They have never had twin songs or twin languages or so many of the other "multiple" things I had eagerly anticipated.  (The number of times I have been sent the viral Twin Baby Talking video since I conceived Molly and Jack is unreal)

My Twins and the Panda

This year as they entered kindergarten we thought it was a good opportunity to let them spread their wings (there may be a lot of animal analogies in this post) and further develop their own identities.  It didn't surprise us too much that Jack is struggling with the separation whereas Molly is not.  The school has been extremely accommodating and has allowed the minions to have snack together once or twice a day to help Jack adjust and things are improving, slowly.

We have never made the birth order of the minions a secret or avoided talking about who is twin A and who is twin B, although I am beginning to understand why some parents decide to keep birth order of their multiples under wraps.

After a conversation with the parents of Molly's new "bestie" it turns out that my darling twin A has made a point of telling people that she is Jack's big sister, having successfully convinced most children and some parents that she is in Sr. Kindergarten and her "pesky" little brother is in Jr. Kindergarten.

Has our effort to make Molly and Jack's role as "twins" not the focal point of who their identity robbed them of some of their multiple experience?  Or is Molly simply displaying typical twin A behaviour? I tend to lean towards the latter.

Any other parents of multiples have any thoughts on "twinness" and birth order and how it's impacted the family dynamic?

To read about toddler "twinning" in the minions click here.

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Elephant Song

I am a typical middle child.  At Halloween many of my costumes were hand-me-down, homemade costumes that used to be my older sister E's: Super Chicken, Clown, Bat Girl and a Cheetah.  As we got older and my parents were outnumbered by the addition of my brother we were "on our own" with costumes using our dress-up boxes, our closets, craft materials and negotiation skills for supplies to figure out what we wanted to be.

Some of my favourite costumes came from that time period, mainly because I chose them myself: Phantom of the Opera, a Butterfly and Marilyn Monroe.

Last year I used Halloween to really celebrate Molly and Jack's twinness by dressing them in corresponding costumes: Bam Bam Rubble and Pebbles Flintstone.  I enjoyed the joint costume efforts more than I ever thought I would and planned something similar again this year, figuring that this would be the last year that I could have so much influence over what they would be.  My plan was either: The Paper Bag Princess and Dragon or Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf.

My sick little Bam Bam from last Halloween.

We had every intention of going to an annual costume exchange to get costume supplies, but life happened as we faced a family birthday party, a work trip, a home renovation and ran out of time to participate.

So last night we went to Value Village to look for our costumes, because used costumes are still recycled goods and much more affordable.  I was thrilled at the gorgeous red and white dress and red cloak with white trim we were able to get for Molly for only $11.00.  We didn't have the same luck with Jack.  As we scoured the racks looking for something that would help him be a wolf, he was immediately drawn to a grey elephant costume.  Chris coaxed me into letting him trying it on.  He was ecstatic, raising and lowering his trunk and making elephant noises with gusto.  A couple passing by told us, "You need to buy him that costume!"  Jack grunted an elephant call and giggled in appreciation.  

We looked at a few other costumes, but nothing compared to my little grey elephant that was ruining my Halloween vision.  Molly later tried on a froggy costume, which was cute, but when we let her choose what she wanted to be, she ultimately selected Red Riding hood as her costume.*

Now I'm in search of a basket and a stuffed toy wolf to go along with Molly's costume.  My children are unique people who will rarely match.  I should have known my days of twin dress up would be limited.  Halloween is supposed to be for the kids and you can't put a price tag on your son's happiness, right?   Especially when the price tag is $5.99 in a used costume bin.  

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*Cause who doesn't like a beautiful crimson cloak?