Wednesday, 17 April 2013

Dat's Mardi Gras (A Spring Cleaning Story)

Last night, after I conquered Mount Laundry, I decided that I'd begin the epic Spring clean that I've been planning since the minions were born over 20 months ago.  I've been feeling out of sorts lately and decided that a good de-clutter might clear my head as well as the epic pile of crap that seems to be invading our bedroom, the nursery and the garage. As I worked my way through all of my drawers (I still need to hit my closet and the coat closet in the basement) I discovered a few post pregnancy truths that I thought I'd share.

If it's in such poor condition that I won't donate it to Goodwill why is it still in my house?  Or on my back?

Maternity leggings are the new cashmere....I recommend them for anyone and am sad that mine got a run and had to be garbaged.

One morning two minutes before I left for work I discovered a giant bleach spot on my black shirt, my brilliant solution: fill in the bleach spot with magic marker.*  I probably should have thrown it into the garbage instead of back into the laundry.

Why do I save bras once the under-wire comes out?  Am I going to decide one morning that I'm mad at one boob and give the other more support and mock it's lack of perkiness?

Why do I continue to put my bras in the dryer when I know that DRYER = BRA MURDER?

I've retired most of my maternity wear, however there are two nursing dresses and tank tops that I am going to wear into the ground.**  Plus you never know when you're going to need easy access to the ladies:  Look who's all packed for Mardi Gras Suckas!  Note to self: clear room in minions dress-up box for excess of Mardi Gras beads.

File:Raining Beads.jpg
Mardi Gras Bead Tree courtesy of Wikipedia

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*Best part is that this is maternity wear, that I was sporting just three months ago, not because I couldn't fit into anything else, but because it was there and it was clean(ish).
**Or until I stain them with bleach and have to use a magic marker to "cover" the stain.

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