Toddler Creed

I recently saw this Toddler Creed and it made both Chris and I laugh because of its poignant truth.  When I tried looking it up on line I found various versions with similar wording, this one was posted on Circle of Moms.

Toddlers Creed
If it's mine, it's mine,
If it's yours, it's mine,
If I like it, it's mine,
If I can take it from you, it's mine,
If I am playing with something, ALL of the pieces are mine,
If I think it's mine, it's mine,
If I saw it first, it's mine,
If I had it then put it down, it's still mine,
If you had it then you put it down,  it's now mine,
If it looks like the one I have at home, it is mine,
If it is broken, it is yours!

I'm tempted to put in little twos to indicate that this motto not only doubles when you're raising twin toddlers, the sentiment is squared.  Below is a version with my own parental commentary:

Toddlers Creed
If it's mine, it's mine, Especially if it's a remote control, dad's contact case, mom's glasses, the phone or that expensive chachki that we were sure you couldn't reach.
If it's yours, it's mine, This includes property stolen from daycare, the doctor's office or nana and grampa's.
If I like it, it's mine, Even if I don't like it, as long as my sibling likes it, it's still mine.
If I can take it from you, it's mine, And if I can't take it from you, I will scream and fight you for it with the strength and fury of a frat boy in a bar brawl.
If I am playing with something, ALL of the pieces are mine, Even if I have to eat them to keep them away from you.
If I think it's mine, it's mine, especially if it's boiling hot tea or mommy's "special juice" AKA wine.
If I saw it first, it's mine, If I saw it second it's mine, if I can't see it, but know it's there, it's still mine.
If I had it then put it down, it's still mine, Even if I have to hide that bottle, so it rots under the couch for five days before mom and dad find it.
If you had it then you put it down, it's now mine, Finders keepers, losers weepers, (I can't say that yet, but I mean it).
If it looks like the one I have at home, it is mine, And it's even better to play with if it makes you cry.
If it is broken, it is yours! Unless I can hit you with the shattered pieces, or eat them.


Have a great long weekend fellow Canadians!

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What, You've never seen a baby in a Richard Simmons wig telling a dog to talk to the hand before?