10 Things I Hate About Being A Twin Mom

Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change my life with my seven year old twins for anything. As time continues to pass as a multiple mom, it's become clear to me that there are specific things that impact me and other twin/multiple parents more than parents of singletons.  I thought these differences would fade away as the kids got older and some have (although others haven't).

As a parent I try to discourage my own kids from using words like 'hate' but here we go...

10 Things I Hate About Being A Twin Mom

via The Odyssey

1. Two kids, one parental/maternity leave, for the same amount of time as anyone having a single child.  The burden of double infant daycare, double toddler care, and double before and after care is staggering. Very few places give a sibling discount (trust me, I've asked).

2. Baby groups are all focused on one parent and their baby.  Mommy and me fitness classes and activities (particularly during the early years) gave me FOMO for life with one baby - something I knew would never have. This left me feeling very isolated during a very vulnerable time postpartum.

3. Once a phase is over, it's over.  My kids went from calling me Mama, to Mommy, to Mom. I also have looming knowledge that I will have two moody teenagers at the same time, two new drivers clamouring to use the car, and double university tuition fees ALL at the same time.

4. Hand-me downs within our immediate family are not a thing.  We need two of the same size at the same time, and it gets expensive when everyone needs new boots, car seats, skates, helmets, etc.

5. You need to stop yourself from comparing your kids to each other, even though they're the exact same age, but still try and embrace the specialness of their twinness (it's complicated). You also need to advocate for your kids when others compare them to one another.

Image via Giphy

6. When people call your kids 'the twins' instead of by their names?  Or ask ridiculous multiple related questions to you or your children (like these top hated questions by parents of multiples)

7. When your children are in the same grade and you volunteer for a school trip, whichever class you end up in, as a parent, it feels like you're picking favourites.

8. You're often fighting with Parks and Recreation about getting two highly coveted (hard to come by) spots in the same level of swimming/skating/whatever else.  If you only get one you need to make the 'executive decision' on who gets to go and who has to watch their sibling participate from the sidelines. Same goes for the strange decisions parents of multiples face on whether or not to put their kids in the same or different classes.

via Giphy

9. It's constant and bizarre compromise.  This year Molly wants a Harry Potter Party while Jack wants a Peanuts party.  We're currently spit-balling other ideas because I don't know what I'm going to do when Voldemort steals the Football from Charlie Brown.

10. Logistical riddles become your speciality, whether it's sleep training, diaper changing, sickness running through your home, or scheduling drop offs and pickups.  A couple of years ago I had to pick up two kindergarten children, at the same time, from opposite ends of the school, so was constantly late for one child.


Click here to read 10 Things I Love About Being A Twin Mom.

Things My Kids Say and Do As Shared on Twitter

We spend a lot of time with the minions and I'm fortunate enough to record the things that they say and do so I can look back on it and laugh.  Some of it makes the blog and other smaller moments don't.  One of the brilliant things about Twitter is how it's the ultimate parenting "elevator speech", because you have to keep it short. Below are recent Tweets, conversations, parental musings and things that the minions have done or said over the past month, for your reading pleasure that haven't made it to the blog.

via Giphy

1. M: I added a sliced cucumber to the side of my glass of milk to make it fancy #parenting

2. J: I’m Cute and smart. You can remember cause it rhymes with toot and fart. #parenting #smh 3. M: can we call daddy? Me: no he’s still sleeping. He’s in a different time zone. J: you mean like in #backtothefuture me: like a business trip that’s two hours behind us. J: well that’s boring

via Giphy

4. J: is the movie #Scream about people screaming #ghostface? Dad: sort of? #parenting 5. J: When we get new fish we can name them whatever we want right? Cause I'm going to name mine diarrhea Me: NOPE!  Just No J: giggle giggle giggle

via MTV

6. M: you know what's the best about moms? That they're soft in all the right places for cuddling #parenting #bodyposi #LoveYourself #bodyimage #effyourbeautystandards #Loveyourself

7. J is reading out loud to me for his homework Me: Why aren’t you reading that part out loud? J: It’s a thought bubble so you can’t say it out loud. It can only be in your head #parenting #ThisIs7

via Giphy

8. M: I need you to sign this birthday card I made & you need to make sure that you write the J facing the right way J: but how will they know it’s really from me?  Me: I think they’ll figure it out by reading your name #smh #parenting 9. M: dad were you sexy ever?  Like a long long time ago! #parenting #thingskidssay 10. Thing 965 my #kids have in common with our #dog  All 3 have an intense need to poop as soon as they get as far as physically possible from a washroom or garbage can

via Giphy

11. It’s amazing how the most drama fuelled kid problems rear their heads 15 minutes after bed time #parenting To see more of what my kids say in real time follow me on Twitter @Sarabethbug

Why Sports & Physical Activity Are Important For Kids

Growing up as a kid in the 1980's my mom would routinely send us outside to play when we were crawling the walls.  Some of my best memories as both a child and an adult involve me coming home dirty, exhausted, and happy after challenging my body to a physical task.  This truly is about the satisfaction of joyful movement. 

According to a CBS News report "Kids and teens age 8 to 18 spend an average of more than seven hours a day looking at screens."  Health experts agree that too much screen time for anyone is detrimental to our health.  Perhaps a little more focus on sports and physical activity can help combat some of these bad habits.

Image Courtesy of True North Sports Camps

*This is a sponsored blog post; however, all opinions and commentary are my own.

**This blog post was sponsored by True North Sports Camps, offering sports programs for kids aged 4-14 in Toronto, North York, Etobicoke, and Markham. Camps include multi-sport and single sport-oriented camps all summer long.

So, why you should introduce your kids to sports and physical activity at a young age?

Their Health Depends On It

The bottom line is that children need to be active every day to remain healthy and grow.  It is recommended that children get at least 60 minutes each day of energetic play.  It will give them stronger muscles, joints, bones, and a healthier heart.

It Helps Them Deal With Stress

Exercise can help rid you of negative emotions thanks to endorphins, whether you're six or sixty.  It also teaches healthy coping mechanisms for someone facing stressful situations from a young age.

It Lets Them Figure Out What They Like (Or Even Love)

It takes time and effort to figure out which physical activities you like best.  Some people prefer team sports like soccer, baseball, basketball, or hockey, whereas others enjoy solitary ones like hiking, swimming, biking, dancing or gymnastics.  The sooner you introduce your child to a variety of options, the sooner they'll figure out which activities they love.  Let them have a say in which activities you sign them up for based on what they enjoy the most.  

Image Courtesy of True North Sports Camps

It Encourages Them To Build Good Habits Early

Children who establish good physical activities at a young age are more likely to carry them into adulthood.  Use this as an example for yourself as well.  Kids respond well when parents lead by example, so consider adding activities you can do together to your calendar.  This could be anything from a walk after dinner, a yoga DVD, to a weekly family bike ride.

It Teaches Them Calculated Risk Taking

Having children practice positive or calculated risk taking through physical activities involving sports and nature will improve their confidence and decision-making processes. 

It Gives Them Important Life Skills

Skills derived from sports can be transferred to other areas of your life.  Laurie Zelinger, Ph.D., a clinical child psychologist, told Parents Magazine, "Loving a sport will teach children vital life skills - discipline, motivation, commitment, and cooperation."

Image Courtesy of True North Sports

It Increases Their Social Interaction

As a kid, friendships at school change all the time.  Having other friendship outlets through sports and physical activity is healthy.  It will also give your children other outlets and people to hang out with should they go through a rough time with their classmates. 

It Improves Self-Esteem

Many studies support that sports and the work towards mastering a new activity can increase self-esteem and confidence. Activities like sports are said to, when introduced in positive and safe environments, allow children to view themselves and their potential in new and exciting ways.   

So, what are you waiting for!  Why not use the good weather as an opportunity for you and your family to explore different sports and physical activities?

Mom...I'm Sorry (Happy Mother's Day)

Each year I reflect on some of the more challenging and humorous moments with the kids.  A snapshot of my experiences as a mother.  I then think about all of the crap I put my mom through and form an apology letter. Some of these are specific to my life, but I am likely guilty of some pretty comparable crimes from when I (or my darling siblings were seven...

Dearest Mom,

I am sorry for...

• waking you up by projectile vomiting all over your bed at 2AM
• breaking my armoir door by stuffing so much of my random crap in it when I'm supposed to be cleaning my room 
• scratching your cornea with the corner of a comic book and leaving you unable to function for two and a half days
• watching the dog eat your laptop charger cord (and doing nothing about it) because I was busy watching TV
• faking sick from school so I don't have to go to an after school activity that you paid a lot of money for me to attend
• pretending I was a superhero, falling down the stairs because I was leaning on the baby gate, and knocking out my tooth, on Christmas
• confessing all of my urgent problems to you (hysterically) an hour and a half after bed time (when dad is out of town and you have a work deadline)
• telling people that I was the one who taught you all about 'the eff word' because I say it so much
• snacking on goldfish crackers in your bed because 'I felt like it'
• telling you about those things that kid did to upset you, two weeks after the fact, when I can do absolutely nothing about it
• borrowing your jewelry and immediately losing it/breaking it
• making you sit through school concerts that are longer than Avengers End Game (even when my performance is less than 10 minutes long) 
• reminding you that it's library/swim/permission form day once we already arrive at school
• waking you up whenever you nap because I need a snack that I am perfectly capable of getting myself

P.S. Still not sorry for the black lipstick I wore as a teenager!

P.P.S I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world!

To see the first ever apology note click here To see the 2017 apology note click hereTo see the 2016 apology note click hereTo see the 2015 apology note click hereTo see the 2014 apology note click hereTo see the 2013 apology note click here

Mama Mia - 6 Tips For Taking Your Kid To The Theatre

As a middle child in a family with three children, some of my fondest memories are from when I got to do things with my parents by myself.  Days when my parents took me to an art gallery, museum, or play without my siblings and then out to dinner where I was permitted to order off of the adult menu were slices of heaven.

As the minions get older and develop their own tastes, it's become clear that Jack is the live music fan, whereas Molly is becoming a theatre buff. This weekend I was able to go to a Community Theatre production of Mama Mia with Molly.  This was her second 'grown-up' play (The first one was Wicked for her seventh birthday) and it was a resounding success.  This play was particularly special since Molly knew one of the leads (a close friend of Molly's aunt) and Molly was able to bring her flowers.

We've had many successes in theatre with the kids, but also fails (the time we took Jack to see Jack & The Beanstalk and he spent most of the time playing in the washroom cause the play was 'boring').

Photo by Donald Tong from Pexels

6 Tips for Going to the Theatre with Your Little/Big Kid

1. Start with Kid Friendly Productions
We're fortunate enough to live in Toronto where there is Young People's Theatre and other kid focused productions who cater to children programming.  It's shorter, cheaper, and often features younger actors who they'll relate to better.  You can even get tickets to Relaxed Performances, which Young People's Theatre says,  "are well-suited to all young audiences and have been established to welcome people who will benefit from a more relaxed performance environment, including people with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)".
2. Go Over the Plot in Advance
More mainstream plays, think Mama Mia, Wicked, Sleeping Beauty, etc. have recorded productions and are based on traditional literature that you can explore with your child before you see the play.  This allows them to go into the production knowing what to expect.  This is particularly helpful if your kid is likely to be scared of something and needs to know how things are resolved or asks a lot of questions since this is something you can do in advance.
3. Try for a Matinee
First off they're usually cheaper, secondly, they have more kids there, and audiences that will likely be kid friendly.  Also if your kid isn't a night person (like Molly) you won't be coping with them having to sit still when they're tired.
4. Walk Around During Intermission
Getting up and walking around during intermission is good for everyone.  It will also break up hours of sitting still.  If you are up for it, give them a snack to help keep them focused on the play and not their grumbling stomach (you can even pack your own most times as long as you don't eat it in the auditorium itself).
5. Let Them Dress Up 
It's fun to dress up, let them wear comfortable fancy clothes if they feel like it.  Be sure to bring layers in case it's chilly in the theatre.
6. If They Aren't Ready Don't Push It
You can try again in a year or two.  Or explore other fun bonding activities together instead.

The Cure - Disintegration Turns 30

Anyone who has known me for a while has heard me talk about the band The Cure (sometimes ad nauseam #sorry #notsorry).  The Cure has been a soundtrack to my life and today I'm feeling a whole lot of nostalgia. The band was recently inducted into The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and this week their album Disintegration (which I'm currently listening to as I type this) turned 30 years old.

This morning the minions didn't want to get out of the car at school drop off because The Essentials with The Cure were on CBC Radio 2.  Today on a rainy Friday I felt a need to re-explore my love for the band and share a few stories about the kids, The Cure, and the time I was on BBC Radio 4 talking about Jack being scared of a Cure poster as a toddler.

To listen to my story on BBC Radio 4 click here (Jack and my story starts just after 19 minutes).

To read about Jack and how our Robert Smith nursery décor gave him nightmares click here.

To read about where the poster ended up click here.

Happy Friday Everyone.