Friday, 9 January 2015

12:59 Lullaby

Over the December break Jack got sick.  For five days he had a fever that spiked randomly, a low appetite and a trace of a cough.  Fortunately, we were off work and able to endure some sleepless nights as we nursed him back to health shortly after New Year's.  One of the common side-effects of having twins, or multiple children of any age, is that they rarely get sick at the same time.  They have a tendency to stagger their illnesses leaving us with what seems like week after week of grossness.

On Monday afternoon, my first work day post holiday, Molly was sent home with a fever of 101.5. That night her fever neared 104.  In the first week of the new year Chris and I have each already been forced to use personal days and Nana and Papa have taken two shifts with Miss Molly.

beach blanket baby
Taking up a lot of bed space, even at 10 months old.

During the course of both of these illnesses (AKA the 13 days of the winter of our discontent (17 days if you count the bronchial cough I've been fighting)), we've sacrificed something very important to us, our adult bed, to sick minions.

It always starts out the same way.  After several awakenings to tend to a sick (or nightmare riddled) child you decide that it would just be easier to let said child sleep in your bed as you surrender to your state of chronic exhaustion.  As a person who has inflicted this unnecessary ordeal on themselves several times over the past fortnight, I give this warning: DON'T DO IT!  Go downstairs, go to a couch, take shifts....just don't let them in or you'll regret it.

10 reasons why letting your child into bed with you is a terrible, horrible, no good very bad idea:
  1. 30-35 pounds of child doesn't seem like it would take up a lot of space, but it does when they starfish (sideways) across the bed pushing you into the outermost corners.
  2. You are berated with constant beverage demands.
  3. The above-mentioned beverages are either consumed loudly or poured all over your bedding, or both.
  4. You are kept awake with conversational gems like, "Mom, that's a light on the ceiling" which apparently needs a response.  As does the question, "Do you like cars?"
  5. If you ask Chatty Cathy (or Cliff) to be quiet and go to sleep, they will cry that you are being mean to them.
  6. You might as well be Goldilocks in a pot of porridge as you get the sauna treatment of a fevered child pressed against your back, followed by a visit from the duvet thief who cocoons in your sheets and blankets while you shiver.
  7. At four o'clock in the morning your child will call for something they've lost in the bed.  You'll tear everything apart looking for said item so they'll go back to sleep, only to discover they've been holding it in their hands the entire time. 
  8. Your back will hurt, because you'll discover (when you get into bed the next evening) that you were sleeping on a blue toy car.
  9. Squatters rights.  As soon as you let them into your bed one night, they'll ask again, and again, for weeks, hoping you'll give in.
  10. You finally settle into a child-free bed only to discover there are crumbs everywhere.  It appears that not only your child, but also the Keebler Elves and six boxes of cookies must have made it into your bed last night.  
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