Thursday, 11 October 2012

I Know What You Did Last Summer

So it's official.  Everyone is pregnant!  Over 30% of my friends and acquaintances are expecting right now (closer to 40-50% if you're only counting those who are married or common law - and that's just that I know of).  I know what you're thinking -  Chris and I are trend setters, because we make it look so easy, right?*  I am absolutely thrilled for everyone**, but don't get offended if I don't ask you what you did for your summer vacation because I now know what you were "doing" on your summer vacation.

Be warned now that I can drink again and you can't I am going to be such a terrible influence on your significant other over the next several months (absinthe - don't mind if we do).

Seriously, in honour of all of my pregnant or soon to be pregnant friends***, and the multitude of baby showers that I will be partaking in come this winter I've provided a list of the gifts that I received a ton of while expecting the minions and why these potential gifts/shopping list items are must haves as gifts for other expecting moms.

Why did I get so many wash cloths?
Because you will never have time to do laundry again (I'm not joking) and they aren't just used for bathing your baby, they're used for bathing yourself and cleaning up the fountains of baby spit up and snot that you are about to experience over the next 2 years.

What's with all of the bibs?
Have you ever seen a baby try to eat?  Besides you can use them as wash cloths when you run out and still haven't done laundry.

This is just what is clean(ish) right now.  But think about it, 3 meals x 2 babies...and this is maybe 2.5 days worth of bibs.

How many receiving blankets does one baby need?
I honestly don't know, I was gifted a lot of blankets, but I used all of them, especially in the first 3 months when we swaddled Molly and Jack like jumbo origami pigs in blankets.  The more giant receiving blankets you receive (think a meter by a meter - or just over 3 feet by 3 feet ) the better.  These blankets still get used by the minions nightly and are great lap blankets in the car and the stroller. 

Why did I get so many socks?
The answer is, you didn't get enough socks. There are never enough baby socks. Think about the number of socks that you, an adult, lose because one of them fell into some sort of laundry black hole and how annoying that is.  Now imagine if you spent all of your time trying to pull off your socks and throw them, onto the road or shove them down the throat of your cat.  Imagine how rare and valuable a pair of matching socks would be.

What are Robeez?
The only slipper/shoes that have any chance of staying on Jack's feet.  Try as we might to move him into running shoes, daycare has had to literally tape his shoes to his feet to keep him in proper attire.  They are pricey, but amazing.  You can get them for $4-$10 used at Once Upon a Child or $20-$30 at most children department stores or in the baby section of Chapters/Indigo book stores.  Multiple pairs are a necessity because you'll lose some or need more than one pair on hand at a time, just in case.  Jack often ends up in pink dragon fly Robeez because we can't find his brown monster ones.

Notice I didn't say anything about Molly's pink dragon fly Robeez, these are both Jack's.  Molly's current sized pair are much smaller and have walrus playing hockey on them.

Happy shopping, nesting and/or gestating.

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*That's right.  I invented being pregnant.  Deal with it.
**Please expect the truck load of baby and maternity items to arrive at your house within 48 hours of notifying me of your impending due date.  Momma wants to see the floor of her garage.
***Don't drink the Kool Aid...It's laced with something...that produces babies.

1 comment:

  1. when I read the first part, I started hoping it was Alex P. Keaton & his lovely lady, just to be there for the first dirty diaper change... hahaha, I'm so mean.