1. M: you know who isn't very good at singing? Chickens! J: yeah they're the worst. Just terrible #ToddlerLife
2. Today I let my son pee in a Tupperware container because there was no other option. He's excited like we just went to #Disney #ToddlerLife
3. It's hard to be angry when your salt & pepper shakers are used for #LEGO #playtime (they are giant ant monsters after all) #parenting
4. M: I just realized something that's going to blow your mind: A Jester is like a clown. Me: Yeah. M: Why aren't you more excited about this?
5. J: You know what the worst part about having a lot of money is? Me: What? J: How heavy it would be to carry #ToddlerLogic
6. Adulting is pretending that it's not hilarious when your child does a spot on impression of one of their teachers #parentingfail
7. J: Did you lock all of the doors? Me: Yes. J: Good, I don't want anyone stealing or messing with my #Lego #ToddlerLife
8. Parenting Hangover: When u feel like u drank a 26er last night, but it was just ur #toddler starfishing in your bed #ToddlerLife
|Gif Courtesy of www.smosh.com|
9. M: I broke up with the big bad wolf because he was late all the time Me: That was it? M: Punctuality is important in a partner mom!
10. J: I have a big problem. My brain is controlling what I'm doing Me: And that's a problem? J: big time. #ToddlerLife
11. Why is it the second I sit down on the toilet a little voice is yelling into the door about having to poo...NOW!!!! #ToddlerLife
12. It's official #LEGO is a bigger pest in my home than #glitter I mean glitter still sucks, but it doesn't stab my foot like #Batman's helmet
To read more blogs on my kids on twitter click here, here, here, here, here, here, and here.