Friday 23 December 2022

ASD & the Truth About Santa

Spoiler Alert this post is about the magic of Christmas, parental lies, and when it's time to come clean with your kids.


I am happy that my kids were gifted with many magical holiday seasons with Santa. While there is a movement of parents who never want to deceive their children about Santa, and I respect that (so long as you or your kids don't spoil the magic of believing for others), we've always been team Santa is magic. That chapter has ended, and now my kids are both entirely on board for helping make Christmas magic for little kids everywhere, particularly their little cousins.




The beginning of the end

Our son Jack was recently diagnosed with High Functioning Autism (HFA), level one autism, what used to be known as Aspergers. Since the confirmation of his diagnosis (something we have suspected for years) I have heightened my research on everything we can do to help Jack become as successful and happy as possible. 


There appears to be a consistent link between people on the autism spectrum and lying, specifically them not lying and having little patience for those who do. Jack is no different. He'll play practical jokes, but he won't lie and is not comfortable lying. When I say "I love you more." to him, he pulls a complete Han Solo and says, "I know." He also hates being lied to (I mean, who likes being lied to, but you know what I mean). When I read an article written by a woman with autism who describes finding out about Santa ending her faith in spirituality and God, I figured it was probably time to come clean with Jack.


When I was in grade six or seven, our teacher "gifted" us the job of responding to Santa letters from the kindergarten kids because it was the 1980s, Christmas was still a part of the public school experience each December. Because we were in middle school, our teacher assumed that we already knew the truth about the big S. This was how a sweet, only-child friend of mine found out the truth about Santa. She was disappointed and sad. I didn't want that for Jack, or worse have him be teased by other kids for being a believer.


My intel

One day, in early November, when Molly and I were out together, just the two of us, I asked her if she still believed. She looked like a deer caught in headlights. As soon as I assured her that the stockings and the present train wouldn't stop no matter what she said, she came clean. Apparently, she found an old letter she'd sent to the big S two years ago that had fallen behind Chris' dresser, confirming her suspicions. When I asked her if Jack knew, she said, "probably? We've never really talked about it."



Norad Image Courtesy of PBS



The big talk

About a week later, I pulled Molly aside and told her we were going to come clean to them both. As we made the big reveal, one thing was apparent: HE HAD NO CLUE. We gave him a few moments to process and told him it was okay to be mad at us. He was quiet for a few minutes and then had some very valid questions. What about the Norad Santa tracker on Christmas Eve? What about all the holiday movies where someone loses their sense of Christmas magic and is proven wrong? He told us he was a little annoyed at us but got it and that he'd eventually forgive us. He also told us that although he is happy that he heard the news from us, he wishes he had another year or two with the magic. 


SNL Image Courtesy of Slate



Inside jokes

A couple of weeks later, when we were decorating our tree, the Christmas song I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus came on, and Jack began to giggle. When I asked him what was so funny, he replied "I just got it!". All holiday season Jack has been having a blast pointing out Santa related "inside jokes" to the rest of us. 


Happy Holidays from our family to yours!




Tuesday 6 December 2022

It's beginning to look a lot like our holiday movie list

Howdy! We've started doing theme movie months this fall and will continue to do so throughout the winter. October was Halloween and scary movies, and November was action month, with a lot of James Bond and James Bond parody movies. For December our theme is naturally holiday movies.

In previous years we focused on seeing as many holiday movies and specials as possible. This year, although our list is still big, we recognized that some movies we're going to save for another year. 

With Jack having a vested interest in horror films (he wants to be a writer and director when he grows up), our holiday movie list has gotten a lot more sinister than years past. Now that the kids are officially tweens, we will watch just about everything with them!

Here's this year's list, and once again, we'll check everything off as we watch it with a Christmas Tree to be festive. Maybe, we'll actually complete a list!


Our Personal Family Classic Specials and Modern Classics

Charlie Brown Christmas

Garfield Christmas🎄

The Simpsons Marge Not Be Proud🎄

Frosty the Snowman

The Grinch (1960s) cartoon

Alien Xmas🎄

Christmas Movies

Home Alone 2 (skipping 1 this year)🎄

Home Sweet Home Alone🎄

Elf🎄

Christmas Vacation🎄

Nightmare Before Christmas

Scrooged

Christmas Chronicles🎄




Romantic Comedy Christmas

Let it Snow🎄

Love Actually🎄

Holidate🎄

The Holiday🎄


New Specials & Movies

(that have just been released or are new to us)

Violent Night (in theatres)🎄

Spirited

Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas Special🎄

Jingle all the Way🎄

The Night Before🎄

The Muppets Family Christmas🎄



Christmas Horror Movies

Krampus🎄

Santa Jaws

Jack Frost🎄

Anna and the Apocalypse🎄

Ginger Dead Man🎄



Adult Holiday Specials

South Park (Mr. Hanky & Christmas in Iraq episodes)🎄🎄