Monday, 14 September 2015

Snack Time! - 10 things the Parents Learned in the First Week of Kindergarten

Last week was the first week of junior kindergarten for the minions.  All things considered, for such a huge change in their lives, they are doing great.  I'm sure they learned a lot, but I'm convinced that maybe, just maybe, the parents learned more this past week.  You be the judge.

10 Things the Parents Learned in the First Week of Jr. Kindergarten

Litterless Lunch
  1. There is a fine balance between the size of the backpack, the size of the lunch bag and the size of the child.  If any of these ratios are slightly off, there will chaos including: left behind lunch bags, smushed class calendars or complaints that your child simply expects others to carry their bag for them, like they're royalty (or in that famous shopping bag scene in Pretty Woman).
  2. Apparently, touching numerous garbage cans and then sticking your hands in your mouth is an awesome game to play on the walk from before and after care to school.  Thankfully our child care providers assure us that it is now understood that this isn't acceptable behaviour.  There has also been a newly developed appreciation for saying the word "disgusting" in our household this week, coincidence? Thankfully garbage day is only once a week!
  3. Stories about a child's day at school can sound surprisingly similar to the movie Kung Fu Panda and The Lion King.  I'm pretty sure that someone's "bad" uncle didn't show up on the playground and steal a red ball from the entire kindergarten class.  Even if he did show up, I think we'd have been notified and he'd be in police custody by now.
  4. The teachers have assured us via email that all children have been wonderful at school and are saving up all of the grouch for the evenings.  Thanks for that.
  5. I previously thought there was nothing more disgusting than the remnants of pudding in an opened reusable container in a lunch bag....(litterless lunch has become the bane of my existence)
  6. That is until I discovered what a banana peel can do to the insides of a lunch bag (seriously, it's like a banana crapped everywhere).
  7. Neither of my children will accept a spork as a multi-functional form of cutlery and keep telling me how "silly" I am for packing your a fork with apple sauce.  
  8. The homework is for the parents.  I spent over an hour and a half on paperwork and forms on the first night of school.
  9. It will rain, a lot, but only during the fifteen minute time period when school children are walking to and from school.  The rest of the time they will refuse to wear their rain coats, attempt to fit them into their backpacks, but sadly the coats just won't fit because of all of the other random objects from the house that have been jammed into said backpack for no particular reason.
  10. Uncertainty surrounding whether or not one of my children has become a sarcastic genius in recent weeks because they've either come up with a clever pun for their teacher's name, or simply can't pronounce it.
What did you learn as a parent during the first week of school?

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