We’ve all heard the inspirational
expressions and credos about how
parenting is one of the most challenging, yet
rewarding jobs that a person can ever have. You’re faced with sleepless
nights, colic, the terrible twos, 5AM driving shifts to hockey practices and
the amazing little fact that we’ve manufactured an extra few years of
adolescence through the invention of a marketing category of “Tweens”,
because teenagers don’t hate their parents enough, we really needed an extra
couple of years of that infamous teenage attitude and eye rolling, don’t we?
On top of the physical,
emotional and spiritual toll that parenting takes, there’s also the
epic financial suck that we
endure in raising our offspring. Seriously, I never realized how
expensive children were until I started pricing daycare facilities. A few
months ago, when it came time to renew our mortgage, my husband and I came to
the realization that, if we remained on schedule, our house would be paid off
as we sent our twins off to college, one mortgage replaced by another epic
expense. The irony is delicious, isn’t it?
At this point in my life, raising four
year olds, I continue to spout positive, semi
martyr filled affirmations about
how motherhood has made me a better person and improved my life. I also
recognize that I may not feel this way if I was expected to perform these same
“duties” 16 years from now. At present, I am blissfully unaware as to the
realities are of having a grown man-cub skulking around the house.
Image courtesy of Pinterest
Would I gift my child “A
Very Merry Unbirthday” present, care of a coldly cleverly executed 20th Birthday Notice
of Expiration of Child-Rearing Services like
Yusa Hasegawa’s parents did? Maybe – it depends on how I was feeling
about the current living situation and my appreciation levels of my student
son. Would I double his newly enforced rental rates when I realized that
he used social media to publicly shame his parents because they were sick of
his slacker bull$%t? Likely.
Apparently the note was all tongue and
cheek and mom and dad sent it as a joke, cause who doesn’t love a good birthday
roast from their parents about how they’re failing at adulting?
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