Things My Kids Say As Shared on Twitter

We spend a lot of time with the minions and I'm fortunate enough to record the things that they say and do so I can look back on it and laugh.  Some of it makes the blog and other smaller moments don't.  One of the brilliant things about Twitter is how it's the ultimate parenting "elevator speech", because you have to keep it short. Below are recent Tweets, conversations, parental musings and things that the minions have done or said over the past month, for your reading pleasure that haven't made it to the blog.

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1. J: you see I can't put the same effort into my drawings at school as I do at home because they're too violent and I don't think the other kids at school could handle it. #parenting

2. Me: what's wrong with your ham J: it's too meat #foodie #parenting #MyKids

3. J: who would win in a fight between predator and Santa?  I mean Santa is supposed to be immortal but I don't think he'd be very good at fighting  #ThingsKidsSay #parenting

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4. M: I had a nightmare that a giant pizza box came to life and tried to eat me. Can I sleep here? Me: let me just move this giant pizza box out of the way. M: mommy you think you're funny but you're not #parenting

5. Talking to our kids about the war of 1812 M: So did that happen when you were a kid? C: That was over 200 years ago. M: So were you alive or not dad? #parenting #facepalm#ThingsKidsSay

6. Trying to explain #CypressHill lyrics to your kids in the car, cause the radio is on and it's #420 #420day #awkward

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7. Tonight's episode of my daughter crying is brought to you by lost tooth swallowed with pizza and apparently the ugly cry is inherited from mom #parenting

To read more blogs featuring the wacky things my kids say as featured on twitter, follow me @Sarabethbug & click here, click here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, & here.

Things My Kids Say As Shared on Twitter

We spend a lot of time with the minions and I'm fortunate enough to record the things that they say and do so I can look back on it and laugh.  Some of it makes the blog and other smaller moments don't.  One of the brilliant things about Twitter is how it's the ultimate parenting "elevator speech", because you have to keep it short. Below are recent Tweets, conversations, parental musings and things that the minions have done or said over the past month, for your reading pleasure that haven't made it to the blog.

Image Courtesy of Giphy

1. Papa: let me take you to where I used to work. M: did they fire you? Papa: no I retired. M: mom is retired just a polite way of saying someone got fired? #smh #ThingsKidsSay #parenting #MarchBreak

2. J: Can you squirt some #ketchup in my mouth so I can pretend to be a T-Rex who just ate a bad guy? Me: Sure. (Things that happen when you let your kids watch #JurassicWorld) #parenting

3. M: sometimes when I eat clementines I like to pretend that I'm eating a human heart. And that the heart is on fire #parenting #ThingsKidsSay

4. Dad: do you want me to get you some things you like to colour? j: I'd like to practice my colouring on pictures of the creepy dummy from #goosebumps you know the one that upsets my sister #siblings #twinning

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5. Spring cleaning your car shows you exactly how disgusting your children are #parenting #AllTheSnacks on the floor


6. J: Are you enjoying your poo cookie? Dad: I'm eating a butter tart J: Whatever you want to call it. It looks disgusting.

7. True love is putting on a damp bathing suit that has been sitting in a plastic bag all day during a #RoadTrip just so you can take your kids for a swim after a long day on the road #parenting #sigh #motherhood 

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8. J: looks at gingerbread cookie "hi my name is Jack and I am going to eat you" #parenting #ThingsKidsSay

To read more blogs featuring the wacky things my kids say as featured on twitter, follow me @Sarabethbug & click here, click here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, &here.

Things My Kids Say As Shared on Twitter

We spend a lot of time with the minions and I'm fortunate enough to record the things that they say and do so I can look back on it and laugh.  Some of it makes the blog and other smaller moments don't.  One of the brilliant things about Twitter is how it's the ultimate parenting "elevator speech", because you have to keep it short. Below are recent Tweets, conversations, parental musings and things that the minions have done or said over the past month, for your reading pleasure that haven't made it to the blog.

Image courtesy of www,glee.wikia.com

1. J: I'm Gollum and you'll never take away my freshness. A six year old interpretation of #LordOfTheRings #Tolkien

2. J age 6: I wrote a new Pigeon book with Mo Willems.  It's called The Pigeon Gets Shot on the Bus.  It's the final book in the series @The_Pigeon #parenting #ThingsKidsSay #LitTweet #KidsBooks

3. M: I lost another pair of gloves today Me: You know what that means. You're buying a pair using your allowance if you can't find them today. M (crying): But gloves are expensive. If I knew you'd actually made me pay for them I'd be more careful Me: #facepalm #parenting

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4. J: Mom, so how do I go about giving myself a really cool scar? Me: You don't. J: I had a feeling you'd say that. I'll go ask dad. #parenting #ParentingUnfiltered #ThingsKidsSay

5. J: So a B&*#H is a female dog? And even though that's what it's called, I'm not allowed to call girl dogs that? Me: That's right. J (giggling): So mommy, a female wiener dog would be called a wiener B%*$H right? Me: Yes. J: Don't worry I won't call them that #parenting

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6. J (age 6): Mom, when I go 2 #HighSchool can u walk me there every day? Me: I'm pretty sure u won't want that. J: Of course I will. Me: Are U willing 2 record a video of u saying this? J: Why? Me: I just want 2 show it 2 u the summer before u go 2 high school #parenting

7. Me: What did you do after school today? M: My friend and I locked ourselves in the bathroom and played Bloody Mary. Then we drew this picture of her. She's covered in blood because she was murdered. You can have it. Me: No, you keep it. #parenting #shudder

To read more blogs featuring the wacky things my kids say as featured on twitter, follow me @Sarabethbug & click here, click here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, &here.

My Kids in 140 Characters (or less) - now upgraded to 280 characters strong

We spend a lot of time with the minions and I'm fortunate enough to record the things that they say and do so I can look back on it and laugh.  Some of it makes the blog and other smaller moments don't.  One of the brilliant things about Twitter is how it's the ultimate parenting "elevator speech", because you have to keep it short. Below are Tweets, conversations, parental musings and things that the minions have done or said over the past month, for your reading pleasure that haven't made it to the blog.

1. No genetic testing. She's mine #parenting #NapLife

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2. Just finished watching #Annie J: Did you know that Venom wrote all of the songs? Dad: Wow, Venom is talented! #parenting


3. Coldest day so far Me at school pick up: Where's your coat? M: I lost it at lunch but I'm wearing a sweater (SMILES) #facepalm


4. M: I had a bad day today. I found out the wedding I attended at recess wasn't real OR legally binding #parenting #ThingsKidsSay

5. What happens when you tell your mini me to play outside. He brings a book.

6. Watching #Grease for the first time with the kids. J: is this the part of the movie where Sandy touches a statue and turns into the ghost?#BestSequelEver

7. Parenting Fail of the day: Giving your child access to their own alarm clock before they can properly tell time and understand why it's not a good idea to set an alarm for random times just because they felt like it.

8. Me: I think I'm going to have a long relaxing shower. At least one of my children: I am going to bust into the bathroom, talk to mom, and take the stinkiest poop imaginable while mom "keeps me company" #parenting #facepalm


9. The girl child figured out how to unpause the judgey #Netflix warning. There is going to be so much #TeenTitansGo binge watching happening in our house #parenting

To read more blogs featuring the wacky things my kids say as featured on twitter, follow me @Sarabethbug & click here, click here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, &here.